fusionatl

As you may have noticed, we usually have about 25 to 35 guests per day. These are persons that either haven't registered as members or others that have registered, but do not log in. This is ok... we understand that some may only want to read what others' questions/comments are.

Others may be a bit shy about posting their questions here out of shyness, shame, or fear of being recognized as having a certain issue/problem. For those (and others who wish to remain anonymous), I've created a member name that will allow you to log in and post your confessions, questions, comments, etc. in a completely anonymous way.

So, this is for you! If you have something you want to get off your chest... or out of your heart... you may not even have the words to form a question of it... no one will mind, go ahead, post it anonymously!

Here are the details:

Username: Guest
Password: lovelivegive

Others (either anonymously or using your member name) can offer support, sympathy, advice, etc.

May you all be eternally blessed!

(testing)

i confess my confession is to confess...just wanted to break the ice first...

But what did you say...

I believe he said that he is confessing that he needs to confess about confession.

I think! Don't quote me on that lol

If you say so.

I'm all confused now.. huh???

i don't really want to spend a lot of time writing this, but i believe i should.

the other day i had compassion for a homeless man. i actually sat down and listened to him. i probably looked so weird or crazy. that's actually cool to think about, considering how weird and crazy people thought Jesus looked when He was putting dirt and spit in people's eyes to make them see again.

back to the story. so i was listening to him. completely focused on him, and occasionally wondering what people that were walking by thought of me (because i get insecure like that). he was so angry. and so depressed. mother left him, father left him. or something like that. i don't remember all the details. from what he told me, he had it rough. i gave him a little snack bar to eat.

as i listened i asked him he began to talk about what he would need to work. he said he gets so angry when people tell him to work. he told me that he tells people "you try working with this" then he pulled up his shirt and showed me two hernias he had in his stomach. it was not a pretty sight.

so i said what can you do? he said he can paint at the salvation army (or somewhere like that). i said what is stopping him? he said he needed to stay overnight to be able to work and it's either like $5 or $6 dollars a night, or $25 a week.

at this i began to wonder whether i should give him the 20 i had in my wallet. see, i had so much compassion for this guy. what if this was my mom? what if this was my mom? what if this was Jesus?

so i reached down in my wallet, gave him the 20. gave him some words of encouragement, and left.

fast-forward to today (friday 2/22/08). i'm walking down the same street and that man is in the same place he was when i gave him the money.

I COULDN'T BELIEVE IT! I got so angry. Who knows what he did with that $20. shouldn't he be painting? i thought. man it made me furious. and i'm not one to get furious...well lately i've been getting a little more furious then normal, sometimes it's good, sometimes it's bad.

so from there...i just couldn't stand homeless people. you know, the whole stereotyping thing. where one person messes with you then you start to hate everyone like him.

well. i was walking home tonight from playing basketball and a man asked me for food. i was walking with a guy i played basketball with and i said "don't have any" and, by the way i was less than a block from where i live, but i wouldn't dare mention that to him. because i was angry at homeless people. they always want. they always beg. that was my mindset.

a heart of unforgiveness.

47Therefore, I tell you, her many sins have been forgiven—for she loved much. But he who has been forgiven little loves little." (Luke 7:47)
simply put, i forgot how much i've been forgiven. and how much has been given to me. how much i've let go to waste. how many times i've been out there on the sidewalk (figuratively) taking and taking and taking and begging and begging and getting and going right back to the same spot.

so i got back. and thought. man, this was where i could've actually just given a man a little something to eat. a little snack. Jesus says that what you do for them, you do for me.

34"Then the King will say to those on his right, 'Come, you who are blessed by my Father; take your inheritance, the kingdom prepared for you since the creation of the world. 35For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, 36I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me.'
 37"Then the righteous will answer him, 'Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? 38When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? 39When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?'
 40"The King will reply, 'I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me.' (Matthew 25:34-40)
so after talking with Amber, i realized this unforgiveness in my heart. i know that God doesn't hear me when i'm not forgiving. moreover, hate just harbors in my heart. what a way NOT TO LIVE! so i had to forgive. it was best for me, and it was best for that man, and the rest of the people i was hating in this world. i even started praying for them.

37"Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven. (Luke 6:37)

so this is my story of how i failed today. this is how i judged. this is how i thought i was right and good and the judge. and this is me saying that i'm a complete failure when i run away from the Master who knows the best way.

but now i'm complete. back in the hands of Jesus. forgiving. loving. and i will offer food to the homeless from now on. maybe my clothes. maybe one day a place to stay.

one giant step at a time.

Wow. Well I'm not sure what else there is to say. Sometimes the best lessons are the ones you teach and learn yourself Looks like you've been in school.

God has something so amazing planned for your life David that he is working things out of you himself. I'm just glad I get to be here when it happens.

The bright side of this whole thing David is that you got convicted of this. How many people do the same thing & feel fine about it. God's favor on you is smacking you upside the head when you are disobedient! That means you are a son of God! (Heb 12:6)
So...where do you go from here? What do you do next time?

Yeah, what if you see him again and again... What if he tells you the same story again and again... Will you still be Jesus to him.

lol...i confess my confession is to confess...lol...sorry i was being stupid

that's a good question avery and johnson.

man if he told me the same story again, i see myself asking him what happened last time. and then from there seeing what way i can help.

but then again, that's conditional. and for some reason, Jesus isn't.....wow.

I don't know bro, don't beat yourself over the head about this...but you do need to find an answer. I don't think God calls us to be stupid with our time or money. I think if you know 100% that the guy is going to buy beer with the $ then you don't give him the money. That's just empowering him. I think if you have $20 and you know that guy's going to do something stupid with it...you walk 10 feet further down the street and give it to someone else! You know what I'm saying? I think that's why God never tells us to just hand money out...but to give people food, drink & clothing. It's much more difficult for people to misuse those items than $$. And, with my recollection of the Bible, I don't really remember where the Bible tells us to simply give people money...I only see God guiding the church to do that...the community of believers...and that is mainly only to orphans & widows. So, there's some more to think about! I love your heart David. Keep chasing after the ways of Christ!

that's good stuff. i talked with todd a while ago about the money thing. and i remember you sayin' it at fusion. what you say makes sense. same with todd (both ideas from you two agree). good stuff. preciate it. holla! oh, and johnson, if you get a chance look at the music section of the forum. you will enjoy the photos (look at the link that todd started). (it's like a treasure hunt