fusionatl

I was thinking about tonight's message, and was confused about a situation I'm in. I have a female friend who I consider my sister, and neither of us would consider marrying each other, or even dating each other. In an event like this, is it still considered wrong to spend the night at each other's houses? I know you said that if you're dating someone and spend the night a lot, it could be considered wrong, but I wasn't sure how everything works if you're just friends.

I would say not to trust yourself. The thing is even if you guys don't have feelings for each other right now, Satan will tempt you one day. It says in Ephesians that our struggle is not with flesh and blood but against the powers of darkness. When that day comes it will be hard if almost impossible to fight it if you are alone in a dark place together.
I don't think it's wise to put ourselves in situations that can cause us to fall.

Check out Romans 7:15-20. It’s kind of confusing but basically it’s a battle. It’s hard to overcome sin once we are in it. We know what we should do and still find ourselves doing the same sin. It's especially hard to stay out of sin when we are strattling the fence. It's so easy to lust toward another person if we are in the situation that promotes it. I think that if you want to be on the safe side to keep a pure friendship between you guys you should not be sleeping over.

I'm going with Ambaaa on this one. i've been in some of thos incredibly close friendships before and no matter how much i told people he was my brother, i had much stronger feelings for him than i ever let on. Alot of women seem to have difficulty seperating physical closeness from emotional closeness. in my opinion, spending the night will eventually cause emotions (even if they aren't present now) to rise.

Let's say that somehow she has escaped this thing unhooked emotionaly. Do you love and respect her enough not to impune her honor? even if nothing ever happens, people talk. your neighbors, her neighbors, other friends, maybe even co-workers. if you aren't going to marry her someone will, and what would her future hubby think about the situation? just thoughts.....

In Ephesians 5:3 it says “But among you there must not be even a Hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God’s holy people”.

You very well may not be doing anything... but what does it look like?

Hey man, I feel you. I understand either for simplicity reasons or b/c you're tired or b/c of the price of gas or for no reason you might want to just crash at her place or vice versa. I don't think you have hidden motives or anything so I'm sure it seems innocent (and at the heart of it it might truly be).

But I have to agree with everybody else here that this is something I call "Courting Temptation". You're basically inviting a sin to come around and take you out. I know, I know, that's not even 1,000 miles from entering into your mind. I was reading an article the other day & the author wrote, "Perhaps on a faraway planet circling some other star, there is an intelligent species whose young males and femals can sleep in the same place without sexual feelings coming up. However that may be, there is no such species on this planet."

This isn't an issue of direct scriptural mandate (No "thus saith the Lord") but it is one where numerous scriptures speak to us. A few that come to mind are to avoid even the appearance of evil (like Ginger was saying), not to trust your flesh (Apostle Paul), and to set an example (Apostle Paul). This is really more of a WISDOM thing than it is an explicit command from God.

And, honestly, I would be REALLY surprised if the girl in this situation isn't reading more into this than she is letting on. I know it's a stereotype, but girls get more emotionally involved quicker than guys do. And if you are making the statement "I'm willing to stay over at your place" you can't tell me that there's nothing inside her that says, "I like that." I'm going to go on a limb here and say it's pretty much impossible to have a relationship like this without developing some pretty unhealthy emotional connections between the two of you.

Like I said, I think this is more of a wisdom thing than a "you're going to hell thing." Even if neither of you have no ulterior motives, I truly think some emotional stuff is being formed between the two of you, you are REALLY hindering your example to the neighbors, and you are placing yourself in a compromising situation. I would say to pull the plug on this thing really quick.

If it's a brother/sister thing then it shouldn't be an issue to do that. Both of your ability to do this quickly & easily will be a first indicator as to see if anything else is going on here. But again, even in the end if nothing is there, it's the wise thing to end the sleepover quick.

Thanks for asking man.

Don't spend the night!!! Congratulations Brandon & Zanta!!!